Category Archives: Latest News

#data will fall

In a ground-breaking move, South African mobile operators have announced a deal whereby people who cannot afford data would be able to barter their goods in exchange for data bundles. The new deal is set to come into effect in 2017 as some ground work needs to be done to design a structure of how this system will work practically.

Speaking to reporters, Vodacom’s Jal nied ta jus Pay said, “we are tired of the FOMO that is going on out there because people cannot afford data and as one of the biggest networks in the country we have taken it upon ourselves to bring data to the people.”

 

The system will see collection centres being set up across the country to collect goods and other items in exchange for airtime/recharge vouchers. Although it is still unclear what goods will be exchanged for which amounts of airtime, unconfirmed reports also suggest that those who have nothing to exchange will even be offered the chance to get contract deals as long they can work it off in 24 months.

 

The deals on offer range from getting a Huawei p9 with 1G of data per month in exchange for doing the Vodacom CEO’s gardening for 2 years to getting an S7 with 5G of data per month for doing lap dances at Teasers on the outskirts of Johannesburg. The latter deal would see the club covering your contract costs.

 

Experts around the world are hailing this new cost model as the way most mobile network providers will go especially in developing countries where data costs are so prohibitive that some people are even unable to respond to friend requests from as far back as 2 years ago.

 

A spokesperson for the Ministry of Communication said, “hopefully this brings down the cost of airtime and who knows people could free up more money to afford university fees making the feesmustfall hashtag obsolete and in turn all the (insertproblemhere)mustfall hashtags”

Why Africa will never win the soccer world cup

After years of research, and by years I mean five minutes of glancing at a few soccer related blogs, I have finally figured out why Africa will never win the soccer world cup.

You can never be good at everything. If there’s one thing that soccer pundits around the world will agree on it’s the fact that no one does sports celebrations quite like the African teams. Of course that’s if we’re not counting the American Major League Baseball mascots. Think Roger Milla and his wiggling waist, Nigeria’s Julius Aghahowa’s back flips or Rashidi Yekini’s arms through the net. All this comes at a price. Since we are so exceptional at celebrations we’ve had to sacrifice actually winning when it matters on the world stage.

As much as we all seem to get infected with varying levels of African patriotism during World Cups very few of us actually believe in our hearts that the African teams can win the World Cup. I sometimes dislike the way we are quick to judge people who openly say this when we actually believe the same.

Since it’s inception (in 1930) no African team has ever won the soccer World Cup so it boggles me to no end that we turn it into an issue every time we don’t do well at this tournament. There is a lot that is wrong in African football from administration, payment issues, Taribo West’s green and white braids (good thing he retired) to Asamoah Gyan wearing the no.3 shirt when he is a striker. Winning the World Cup would go a small way in fixing that but by no means would it mean an end to our footballing woes.

And to qoute another blogger who rightly corrected me “World Cup soccer is for nations, not for continents. So indeed, Africa will never win it. Nor Europe by the way.”

So with that said as Africans let’s stop the bickering and do what we’ve always done every World Cup since Pele… keep calm and support Brazil!